Presentation of the patient:
The patient was in cognitive-behavioral treatment when she came to the clinic. She complained about something holding her back. She was very shy and began to loosen up, when she joined a pentecostal church. The legalistic doctrine of her church kept her from reunions with her school colleges and family members, because she thought they were sinful. After one year of dating the church expected her to marry to prevent sin. Her sexuality transformed into a burden after a traumatic honeymoon. Her husband had not cut the umbilical bond with his mother, yet, causing nasty conflicts between the patient and her mother-in-law. When the patient started treatment with EMDR-J, an abuse memory with lasting consequences came up. The patient's treatment was very intense and complex. The author chose several sessions of different periods in order to give an insight in the patient's treatment.
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| Illustrative photograph by Jörg Garbers |
Third session
The colors changed. The picture seems like a cartoon. There's a person kneeling down. The walls are yellow. There are several doors and a colorful wind. The patient visualizes herself entering the picture and gets to the place of the cartoon. There's a white door. Darkness pulls her. She wants to leave the kneeling position. Darkness calls her. The patient feels sad and her chest is heavy. There are things coming out of the dark door. Something is suffocating her. She wants to withdraw. The space is filling with pipes. The floor turned white. She is falling. Darkness pulls her in. She is swallowed. The hall is filling with white. She goes to the hall next to the door and enters. It's very dark, but there are little lights. She is walking. There's a floor and sometimes light behind her. It's not black anymore but grey. The place is getting smaller. There's light above and the floor is white. At her right something is going on. A little monster approaches. It's no monster, but a white cupboard. She stops in front of the cupboard. There's a little animal next to her foot. It's no animal, but an object. The hall is filled with people. Sometimes they are people, sometimes they are objects. The objects are walking in her direction wanting to talk, scaring her. Somebody goes down to the basement. She is downstairs without any fear. There's a party upstairs. She relaxes and goes upstairs. She is upstairs and wants to turn the lights on. All things are in place. A white double bed is illuminated. There are two bodies in the form of shapes. It's like messing with play dough.There's a blue butterfly, something brown moving and a baby. Something penetrated. The blue of the butterfly turns yellow, red and blue again. She is walking on green grass on a trail. A car passes. She sits on a bench. She is not alone.
